“I want to ride my bicycle/I want to ride my bike/I want to ride my bicycle/I want to ride it where I like” — Freddie Mercury
I received a Facebook message from Jolie Patricia Sester who was a classmate at Rollins College. Jolie is now the chief executive officer for Variety — the Children’s Charity of Florida and she was asking for my help with their annual bike build. You know the thing about writing a blog about saving the world is it makes it hard to decline such offers, so I said I would be there, and I spread the word to my friends, then I let Brendan know he would be doing it, too.
On Christmas Eve in 1927, eleven entertainers found a baby left in the Sheridan Square Theatre in Pittsburgh. Baby Catherine, as she came to be known, had a note pinned to her from her mother explaining that she was a mother of nine and with her husband out of work, they could not afford to take care of the baby, but she had always heard of the kindness of people in show business and hoped they would take care of her. Not only did they take care of Catherine, they established Variety Club International (now Variety — the Children’s Charity) in 1928,which provides programs and services for kids with special needs.
Saturday, December 12, 8:30AM: Wake up late. I set our fancy iPod port alarm clock, and having me set it is always a mistake. I haven’t a clue what I’m doing wrong, but the damn thing won’t go off if I set it. I wake up Brendan and let him know we’re running late — we’re supposed to be there at 9:00 AM. I get myself ready, feed Morton, put food out for the stray cat that I haven’t seen since we returned from our Thanksgiving trip. (A few days later we’ll discover that the stray will not be coming back — a victim of the careless traffic on Robinson St. running along our house. The squirrels have been eating his food.)
8:52 AM: Remind Brendan that he needs to get up. It is clear that he’ll be grumpy today. Ah, the joys of volunteering.
9:17 AM: In our van, on the way. Text Jolie that we’re running late. We make our way across town to an industrial park in an area not far from the airport.
9:45 AM: Finally arrive at the distribution center. I’m immediately excited seeing some of the bikes already put together.
9:48 AM: Sign in with a woman who seems slightly grumpier than Brendan.
9:51 AM: Find Jolie for instruction. Since we didn’t bring any tools, she flags down a volunteer who can loan us his tools. Jolie asks us if we know how to put a bike together, I reply I think so, but Brendan seems pretty confident he knows how.
9:55 AM: Tools in hand, we stake out a table. There are many rows of tables inside the warehouse, staffed with busy volunteers. On one side of the floor there are stacks of bikes in boxes.
10:13 AM: Our first bike is done! This achievement was preceded by staring at the parts for a bit, deciphering unhelpful instructions, learning the hard way that the pedals screw on clockwise on one side and counter clockwise on the other, and realizing we don’t have exactly the tools we need but can make them work. While Brendan has gone to grab another bike, I straighten out the handlebars that he put on the first bike. I would mention it to him, but he’s grumpy remember.
10:20 AM: Bike number two is complete!
10:32 AM: While we’re working on bike number four, I get a visit from my old friend irony. The family next to us brought their kids and the kids are getting in the way of our bike building. In the midst of a you-kids-get-out-of-my-apple-tree thought, I realize we’re building bikes…for kids.
10:42 AM: Starting bike number six and we’ve found a groove with each of us working on the parts of the bike we’re most comfortable with. We have a quiet laugh about the guy at the next table complaining because the bikes keep switching from metric to standard and back again. Since we’re improvising, we haven’t even noticed. Ah, ignorance truly is bliss sometimes.
10:49 AM: One of the police youth explorers drops off another bike to be assembled. We look inside the box and see it is a different color than the ones we’ve been working. Oh, crap! That’s a boy’s bike! We’ve been working on girl’s bikes so far, there’s no way we can do this.
10:53 AM: As we complete the sixth bike, Brendan realizes I’ve been straightening out the handlebars on all the bikes. Instead of responding grumpily, he is sure to straighten them out the rest of the day.
10:54 AM: While I’m gone to pee, Brendan has gone to get a girl’s bike instead of working on the boy’s bike.
10:58 AM: Variety’s president Bob Winters comes by and gives us a gentle chiding for skipping over the boy’s bike. Bob’s a nice guy and our fear of building a boy’s bike has put him in danger of getting grumpy.
11:04 AM: We’re working on the boy’s bike. We reflect on bikes as a gender issue. Why is it that the girl’s bikes we’re building have a padding on the yoke and the boy’s bikes don’t? Boys have something to protect from the yoke. Also, the girl’s bike has a low bar and the boy’s has a high bar. Again, testicles are in danger here.
11:05 AM: Bike number eight — a boy’s bike — is complete! No time to celebrate, we have more bike building to do!
11:06 AM: A man I don’t know makes a loud announcement that gets everybody’s attention: “THE BIKES WILL NOW EGRESS ON THE SIDE OF THE BUILDING WITH THE DUMPSTER.” I joke with Jolie that he’d been waiting his whole life to use “egress” in a sentence. The rest of the day I’ll wonder if he actually used the word correctly.
11:15 AM: A little change of pace, we are working on baby bikes. There are two in a box, so we each work on one. We’re kind of excited that this will help up our tally.
11:35 AM: Bob brings a bike in that wasn‘t put together properly. He brings it to the metric guy who is apparently an actual mechanic because he mentions (a lot) that he can’t wait to go work on his car afterwards. Brendan and I study the bike out of the corner of our eyes and decided it isn’t one that we worked on. Whew…that would be embarrassing.
12:02 PM: Ladies and gentleman, we have completed bike number 20. Santa’s elves can suck it! Serendipitously we are rewarded with food donated by Ale House.
12:20 PM: Channel 2 is here, as well as other media, so we all gather outside for a photo op. The rows and rows of bikes fill my heart. It is easy to smile for the camera.
12:25 PM: As a souvenir, I buy a pin that features Kermit the Frog, the two dollars will go to Variety. On the way to the car, I let Jolie know we have to head out due to work and thank her for the opportunity. She introduces me to one of the recipients. The young girl’s face is beaming as she makes her way around the volunteers…and nobody is grumpy.
Want to help save the world? Join the Scottie Saves the World Team for Heifer International. The world needs us.
