(Photo courtesy Robert Kusserow)
Robert Kusserow was prepared for his 14-year-old Pekingese poodle, Lucy, to pass away, but never thought he would lose her younger sister, Bella, before then.
When Bella started coughing one night, she was brought to the vet for an emergency overnight visit. Soon after, Kusserow and his husband, who reside in Orlando, left the clinic, assured by the veterinary staff that Bella would be fine.
“Four weeks later, I woke up, and I looked at her, and I knew she was dying,” Kusserow says. “And I said to my husband, ‘You need to say goodbye.’ I said, ‘I’m going to rush her to the hospital, but I don’t think she’s coming back’. I rushed her to the hospital, and they did an emergency surgery. They tried to save her, and the surgery was successful, but she died during recovery. Her heart gave out, so it was just… it was absolutely unexpected.”
Overwhelmed by grief, anger and hurt, Kusserow, who happened to be taking screenwriting classes at UCLA, leaned into learning how to write.
With that came “Bella’s Light: A Story About Pet Loss and Love That Never Ends,” a children’s book that Kusserow says originally started as a way for his inner child to find closure.
“The reason I decided to take it out to the world rather than just keeping it to myself is that I hope that it can help others maybe understand that when someone we love dies — it doesn’t even have to be a pet, it could be anybody — that love for them still exists, it just changes,” Kusserow says.
As an actor, producer, screenwriter and now an author, Kusserow says a crucial part in this journey was the use of AI, which assisted him with illustrating and self-publishing the book.
“Five years ago, bringing a project like this to life as an independent author would have likely meant hiring specialists in publishing, formatting, marketing, public relations, and distribution, or spending years learning those skills myself. What AI gave me was something I never could have afforded: access to expertise across dozens of disciplines.”
Although Kusserow says he understands why some people are skeptical of AI, with a love/hate relationship of AI himself, he says he sees it as a tool to help creators bring their ideas to life, rather than a replacement for human creativity.
“‘Bella’s Light’ exists because of love, loss and a desire to help others,” Kusserow says. “Those are deeply human experiences. AI was a supporting tool that helped me navigate the process and bring Bella’s story into the world. Bella was a real dog. Her story is real, and the love behind her story is mine. AI can’t replace authentic human experiences, and I don’t believe it ever will.”
“Bella’s Light” is described as a tender and hopeful picture book for families navigating pet loss. The story gently reminds children that love never disappears, it simply transforms into a light that stays with us always. It is not just for children as it is also for anyone who has ever loved and lost a pet.
Since being published a little over two months ago, “Bella’s Light” has received a five-star rating from Readers’ Favorite, a book review and award contest site. Kusserow says he’s also noticed a trend of adults buying the book for themselves, rather than for children.
“I’ve given it to some moms to give to their kids, and they’re like, ‘Oh, my kids loved it,’ but were like, ‘I took it back from them,’” Kusserow says. “So, I find it seems to resonate with adults, and even with older adults.”
Working to get “Bella’s Light” in front of grief counselors, as a resource for others experiencing loss, Kusserow says much of the feedback he’s received has been online, from the pet loss community.
“After Bella passed, Lucy at night would like to go and sit on the back patio, and it was like she was seeing something,” Kusserow says of the story’s inspiration, which sees his beloved pet become a star in the night sky.
“I would see her just sit there, like she is this old woman dog, and she would sit there looking at something in the night sky,” he explains. “Then as she would just watch it, I would think, ‘Is she watching her? Is her sister here visiting and she’s watching her go up?’ That’s why I was like, ‘maybe Bella’s a star now.’”
In addition to an accompanying audio and coloring book for “Bella’s Light,” Kusserow says he plans to publish a series of 25 books in total that cover Bella’s entire life. A second Peekapoo Sisters addition, entitled “Bella’s Empty Space,” is already in the works.
When Bella initially passed away, Kusserow says it hurt too much for he and his husband to see all her items around the house. He says the realization of those empty spaces she left behind served as inspiration for the sequel.
“At first, we both were so upset by them that we couldn’t even look at them … and at some point, we were like, ‘no, we can see the good side of it,’ right? There are good memories of the empty spaces that she left behind.’ Those can be good memories, they can be painful, but they can also be positive memories.”
For the entire, not-so-positive side of Bella’s story, Kusserow says he is planning to release a longer documentary on “the real version” of what happened during her initial vet visit, called “Emergency Care.” He says it will feature the corporatization of emergency veterinary care in the United States and its potential effects on health care.
Still early in the publishing game, Kusserow says it will be a while before “Bella’s Light” can be found in brick-and-mortar bookstores. He says that if interested, readers can ask their libraries to stock the hardcover and audio versions of the book.
For now, “Bellas Light” can be found on Amazon, Barnes and Noble Online, Books-A-Million Online and any reading platform that offers audiobooks. For more information, visit PeekapooSistersProductions.com.
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